Sarah Morris, H.O.P.E. team
Seventy-five percent of all suicide victims give warning signs. These may include loss of energy, change in sleeping and eating patterns, and uncontrollable outbursts. People may also not go out as much, give away some of their valuables, or say goodbye. Some people are clearer about how they feel. They may simply say, “I don’t want to live anymore.”
Dealy Blackshear, Mental Health Clinician
If a person is threatening suicide, I would try to come up with a safety plan—even if just for that day. I would say, “Okay, you’re getting ready to leave here—where are you going to go? You’ve got these options of places you could go—your friend’s house, your mom’s house, the clinic—where do you want to go? What are you going to do when you get there? If you feel bad tonight and need to talk, who could you talk to?” Most people don’t want sympathy, they just want someone to listen to them.
If a person goes to a mental health hospital, they’re not being sent away—they’re going because they want to. They go because they want to take control of their lives, so that they can be more successful.
Rita Buck, Health Aide
I would sign an agreement with a person considering suicide. Have them read it, and sign it, or write it themselves—that they will not hurt themselves in any way, that they’ll keep themselves safe, and tell a mediator—like me—the next day. And to make plans for a loved one—family, a friend—to stay with them during the night. Suicide doesn’t have to be an option—there are people who can help, there are better days. And there are a lot of resources that help people get better.
Willa Ashenrelter, Retired Health Aide
I’d let them know that there’s always someone available, that they don’t have to be alone, there are people who are always willing to listen, and to help. “Options” means that there are other ways or other things you can do than suicide. A person considering suicide needs to talk to someone who can make them aware of these other options. If you talk to them, not about tomorrow, but about what you can do today, or for the next hour or two, you may save a life. We must treat sadness as a fact of living—and trust that hard times don’t stay, they pass. That has been a big help to me.
Dean Pushruk, Community member, H.O.P.E. team
I’d be here going to ball games, or some of the activities in the village—sometimes I’d sit there smiling, just acting normally and saying things that people want to hear. But all the while, I wanted to cry and holler, scream that I missed my boy. It’s a pretty empty feeling—me losing John. March 24th would have been his birthday. But, you know, he’s no longer here.
Ed Silcox, Teacher, H.O.P.E. team
After the loss of a loved one, people experience a variety of emotions—shock, anger, denial, rage, and a dark emptiness. This cycle of experiencing and relieving grief is described in the “Cycle of Healing.” It has twelve stages: trauma, shock, blame, denial, rage, violence, depression, awareness, ownership, release, and healing. It is necessary to experience these feelings in order to heal.
Rita Buck, Health Aide
A lot of time we don’t know how to go through a grieving process. When someone commits suicide and we’re sad, we need to go through a need time to grieve our loss. It’s okay to cry, it’s okay to talk about things—get it out in the open. Hiding it or holding it in doesn’t heal.
Jenna Fagundes, H.O.P.E. team
There is something special, some reward, for going through life’s pain and happiness. We have survived for a good purpose—to help others. Life is too precious to throw away—it takes more courage to save your life than to destroy it. There is something special about living and experiencing life to its fullest—and never giving up, even when it gets too unbearable to continue on.
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